I would like to thank all of you who committed on my last blog (and those who read and chose not to comment or to point out my errors.)
I don't think I am going though "Midlife Crisis Part II." FD, I am guessing, hopes not. Following my last one I married her and even thought she likes the HBO program "Big Love" I am not sure she would want a sister/wife :) But I am feel adrift.
My job, which on the whole I like, has lately been fuzzy. Not sure what my job is now. New boss seem to want to do what my job has been and at the same time I feel like I am making "boss" decisions to keep thing moving at work.
I don't want the "boss" job. I do not have the credentials to do the job and fund raising is not my passion, I can do it but it was not what I was hired to do. Boss wants to do what he perceives as the glamor part of my job, flying half around the world for a two day meeting. That to me is not glamor but a week of unsettled sleep.
The hardest part at work right know is that there is an expectation of fawning over everything he does. I know - I know it speaks more to his insecurity than anything else and I don't mind giving praise when it is a natural response and as a pastor I look for thing to help people to see God at work in their lives but I an not "The Pastor" in my job here, I do not want to spend time noticing every little thing my boss does and praise him for his brilliance in booking a flight (because he has just told me how great a job he has done)!
That said, my understand of leadership is that troubles flow up and praise flow down.
Maybe it is my stoic Presbyterian outlook, but when I do something well, as long as I know it (and if I do God knew before I did) it does not matter if anyone else notices. Anyway doing things well is what is expected, praise should not be expected.
I also think giving praise is like giving presents, giving is a whole lot more fun than receiving.
The only time when giving praises and gifts are not fun is when they are expected or preserved to be deserved.
I guess this goes back to my understand of salvation. Salvation is only salvation when it is unexpected and undeserved.
1 comment:
Your boss does sound insecure and it is good that you recognize that but still..I can see where he would be annoying.
You are a Christian, a man of God - let him see God in you. Maybe he is meant to learn from you even if it doesn't seem like it. Just be true to yourself and do what seems right to you. Obviously, if he did something worthy of praise then praise him otherwise don't do what doesn't seem right to you. You will resent him and in the end it will be hollow.
I have found if an adult has done something out of line that directly affected me in a negative way - like an inappropriate comment - I would just say,"I didn't appreciate that." The message is short and to the point and people then say they are sorry. I have only done it a few times but it has worked.
Also, if there is a facet of your job that you don't especially care for - do it with joy anyway and maybe he will want to do that too and then you will be freed up to do more of what you want.
Then you know - power in prayer.
Have a great day! :)
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